An Open Letter to the Bad Drivers of Columbus, Georgia

Dear Bad Drivers,

I would like to start with a disclaimer.  I am by no means the perfect driver and there is no need for any family member or person by the name of Josh McKoon to comment on this post.

Next, I would like to point out to those for whom this post is dedicated that I realize that the reason that you not very good at driving is not all your fault.  You probably took driving lessons from other Columbus drivers who also came from a long line of Columbus drivers and I am guessing that this has been a trend for a while now.

Lastly, I would like to discuss several issues common to the Columbus driver.

Number OneBlinkers.  People, these are not luxury items. You did not pay extra for these little lights to flash as a small decorative device to make you look cool.  These lights-blinkers, if you will-were placed for alerting fellow drivers of your next move.  Not only is courteous for you to actually use them, it can also be a safety issue.

Number TwoHeadlights. I am more than aware that the sun sets at a later time in the summer.  However, it does set and that means that your headlights should come on.  I would also like to point out that most new cars have automatic lights, so why your lights are off in the first place is beyond me.  It is not macho and I am almost certain that the specific driver that I am referring to was not in the middle of a gang initiation.

Number Three- Entrances and Exits. I have yet another disclaimer.  I have to admit, that at one point or another, I have entered parking lots and other areas in an incorrect manner. Yes, I know. You are all gasping in horror.  Whatever. However, I have never done so at the expense of another driver.  Lady, the sign said EXIT and I was on the side I needed to be on to turn left out of the parking lot on to Whitesville Road. There was not enough room between my car and the curb for you to get through.  Thank you for using your SUV powers to bully me into turning right and having to turn around.  I also appreciate the look of “Don’t-look-at-me-this-is-your-fault” on your face. Yeah…that was great.

There are other issues, such as indecisiveness, improper lane changing, riding my tail, and ridiculous parking choices, but I will save that for another post.